Exclusivity

I was recently speaking to someone a bit older than me and mentioned something about how people from my generation (borderline Millennial/Gen Z over here) go through the stage of being ‘exclusive’ before they get into a full-blown relationship. This person I was speaking to had no idea what this was, and once I had explained it, they thought it was a very strange concept! Generational differences, maybe?

                            My lovely manager Harry and his boyfriend 🖤

I would describe being exclusive as a relationship trial. It’s basically a relationship scenario, you’re not seeing anyone else, but without the added pressure of an actual relationship. So things like meeting the parents etc, are off the cards in this period. There are less expectations as there is no official label, but it is expected that you do not date anyone else.

It is a bit of a bizarre concept I suppose, if you know you like someone enough to not want to see other people, then surely you’d want to be in a relationship with them. But it’s weird, it just feels like the next step; talking stage, exclusive stage, relationship. I don’t know, it just makes sense (to me, anyway). 

After being exclusive with someone for OVER A YEAR (don’t @ me, I know) I now would never let this period go over 2 months. If someone isn’t sure if they want to be in a relationship with you after 2 months of being exclusive and pretty much acting like you’re in a relationship, they’ll never be sure. 

Now you may be thinking ‘why on earth would I take advice from you?’ Yes I know my history isn't…promising, BUT it does mean that I have experienced this first hand!! I have been in a ‘situationship’ as you call it, with a guy who wouldn't commit to me. And let me tell you, if they wanted to be in a relationship with you, you would know. So, if they just want the perks of a relationship without the actual relationship, RUN. 🚩